Navigator

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Navigator

January 9, 2001, 11:01 pm

Needing no second bidding.Here's the latest (much revised) version.NavigatorThe capstan groaned and sails flashed out unfurled,then filled; I keyed a course--h t t p:-- and started out across a cyber...

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Re: Navigator

January 9, 2001, 11:36 pm

Magnificent poem, David. Nice for it to have been resurrected, too. It comes back as an old soldier and not the greenhorn that all these drafts must necessarily be.Having said that, I shall...

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Re: Navigator

January 10, 2001, 10:15 am

Thanks Peter.I think you're right, and I've changed it.(I never received that voice recording, by the way.)Regards

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 4:55 am

I see what Jason meant about this poem :-) It is glorious! It does just what I was trying to do by creating an unforgettable image. I do feel slightly disappointed that my original ideas - aren't,...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 5:05 am

Sorry, my explanation seems to have been chopped off half way. What I was commenting on was simply that, with my accent, I put the emphasis on all three words, 'sails, 'flashed' and 'out'. 'Flashed'...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 3:49 pm

dizzy--In "sails flashed out," what occurs is a phenomenon known sometimes as "demoted stress"--when 3 accented syllablesin a row occur, the middle syllable receives less stress thanthose on either...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 5:28 pm

Please allow me to introduce myself: I'm Crispin from The Netherlands. I am an absolute newcomer out here, so I'll promise to behave right modestly (for the time being that is: Dutch courage you know...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 9:17 pm

Hi, David.Lovely sonnet; Im delighted to be sharing the cybersea with such a competent sailor.Dutch,Welcome to Sonnet Central.&nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp &nbsp...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 10:21 pm

All alliterations are always abominable. Alternative arrangements are also as awful.p (doh)

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 10:38 pm

Thanks a lot, Mr Museeker. Thanks for your contribution and your welcome. I think I will learn like never before visiting this marvelous site. PS: Going through your list of poetic devices I couldn't...

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Re: Navigator

January 11, 2001, 11:41 pm

'marvellous' in my Reply of course with double -L. Such a shame, talkin' double Dutch like that.

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Re: Navigator

January 12, 2001, 12:03 am

That is so interesting! I would love to know where to look for more information on all the aspects of writing that keep cropping up. Are there particular references that anybody would recommend?

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Re: Navigator

January 12, 2001, 12:19 am

Diz,I have been using The New Book of Forms: A Handbook of Poetics a lot lately (since I bought it). It is quite technical and doesn't go into a lot of the fine artistic analysis that Museeker gave...

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Re: Navigator

January 12, 2001, 1:25 am

Hello Dutch.Welcome to the Board.We have another Dutch member--Remco--who posts lovely sonnets, including translations. You Dutch shame us all, with your effortless command of other languages.I think...

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Re: Navigator

January 12, 2001, 3:46 am

Thank you for your feedback. I gather you are living in the good old UK? As a loyal listener to Radio Four I think I know something about English 'oddness'-- and I like it (as most Dutch do). So...

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Re: Navigator

January 13, 2001, 1:04 am

David,Take this for what it is worth.sails flashed out totally throws me out too.I think it is the short a sound it draws too much attention to itself.Otherwise nice job.Melissa

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